Fuck you, I didn't realize how cynical I was before this. I knew everything and everyone sucked, but I didn't think about it this much.

Confusion, he saw us on the couch cuddling and got... jealous?  Maybe not, I was just surprised he even noticed.

Big mouths are such a turn off, I felt like my whole face was engulfed.  I don't think it was the size of his mouth though, I think that the concept of making out was totally new to him.  After all, most other things were new... actually, I should have realized it before he told me, especially considering we had to walk to 7-11.  I felt guilty and couldn't do it, it didn't matter to me though, why would it to him?  akgdha;lgh

I'm really glad I met you.

I need a way to organize it all.
For one, I always over-analyze things, everything is torn apart.  The other, misguided by my stream-of-conscious words.
I love hearing a myriad of perspectives on spirituality.  Let's talk about enthogens, nihilism, religion.


oh hey, Black Moth Super Rainbow you gonna rock my world.

Why do these trivial things dominate our lives as teenagers?  Everything seems larger than life, because our own lives are still so small.  Your actions sometimes worry me, but I have to remember that we are supposed to be immature, still some things are not worth the risk.

Nothing works here, not even hobo-esque friends and bike rides.

I don't like arrogant, ageist, fuck buddies who sit in corners drinking vodka and complaining.  Waking up in a room filled with my friends drawings all over the walls was a good cheer-up, though.  Oh, and lovely nights in westover with cute people.
On another note, please leave me alone, this is nearing stalkerish. :(

Glorious night, but I can't shake the feeling that there were other motives.

My bike is so jubilant right now!  Filled with the joys of warm weather and finally getting out of the shed.

My bike and I, we love getting lost with our other friends, both human and bike variety.  We roam around for hours, settle down in the golf course with a hookah in hand and dash out to the field to see the stars.  The course is for once utterly void of human life, the only life to be found is the drops of dew forming on the wet grass.  A place that is the quintessential hang out spot for the upper class during the day, is an ideal sleeping spot for us at night.

There is a total lack of cute people in my Spanish class.  In fact, the majority of them are not in college at all, rather grandmothers deciding to put learning Spanish on their bucket list.  I already know I'm going to fail this class.  I want to work at Finders Keepers, or somewhere that doesn't leave me smelling like grease.

Sometimes, I feel like each day just passes, and I am not really there.  I am just floating through life, waiting through life, wasting my time.

Did you ever have a job that you hated and worked real hard at? A long, hard day of work. Finally you get to go home, get in bed, close your eyes and immediately you wake up and realize... that the whole day at work had been a dream. It's bad enough that you sell your waking life for minimum wage, but now they get your dreams for free.

Dave Soles lied to me, the weather is nice and my lips are still chapped.  When life is filled with school dreams are a no go.  I'm too tired to deal with that shit.

"como te llamas?"
"watashi wa jillian desu."

Tentative classes for next year:
8:20 AP VA/US History
A Spanish II
B Art II
C Art III
D AP English 11
E Precalc Int.
F AP Chem
G AP Chem
H German I
Ind. Study Photo III
Psychology or Sociology at NOVA

I don't know how I feel about passing my drivers test, I was almost hoping to fail.  Falling into the comfort of being able to drive and having a car is not something I want.  My bike will be lonely.  I am almost up to 0g, and it's painful.  Does anyone want piles of lip rings and labrets?  I might put them on freecycle if I can't find anyone else.

I want more Philip K. Dick books to read, or anything, I need to read.

Matty pop chart pretty much rules my life right now.  and Evan Greer.

After work today I was compelled to bike to Clarendon, ran into Charlie on the way back.  He seems to be my go-to buddy on my way home from work.

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/nva/cto/1107859008.html
I like this car.  I want to fix it, care for it, love it, and make it my bed.

I have strawberry blonde hair and a lack of snakebites on my lips.  I feel clear.  Some cheek piercings would be nice, though.  Or any new piercing, I'm bored already, nose?

It's hard to narrow down your windstream to just one hole on the harmonica.  I can play some Dylan, though.

The park.  It was always the park, us westover kids.  In the rain, in the summer, we left our real lives and venture into a mystical world in the park.  My mind was blank, I couldn't find it if I tried.  The night held secrets of second lives.  We hid under the slide, blocking the rain, and daytime worries.  I can still remember the night it ended, I knew the time had passed.
I could feel everything slowing down, I never made the effort.  I had no confidence in you or with you, but somehow you always called “it’s been a while, we should go to the park again sometime.”
It should have been a sign when I was shivering and you couldn’t warm me, I never noticed the weather before that night.  It was obvious this was the last escapade, so I dropped hints until you left.  Then, I lay under my favorite tree and froze.

*wither*

Today two mothers guarded me like I was a small child, their small child.  It was really unusual.  I've been dying to go for a bike ride, but because of my lack of preparedness for the winter, I can't stand to be out for more than half an hour.